What are You Waiting For?

I can’t demonstrate emphasis my typing but there are at least 9 different meanings that can be taken by sliding and slurring emphasis from one works or a combination of words.

What are you waiting for? What are you waiting for? What are you waiting for? …

I woke up this morning with a strong waiting which begs a why response. Why am I waiting? Am I afraid? Am I unsure? Is the decision made but I don’t like the direction it leads? Will I be disappointed? Will someone else? Am I procrastinating or being reflective?

Far from the madding crowd, this morning, tucked away in our little retreat it should be easy to work through the options and possibilities but is/has been frustrating. I understand the irony of being anxious and upset about having to wait to discover why I am waiting.

I am not going to let the anxiety force the decision even though that is my modus operandi. I am going to let the choice arise from carrying it for a couple days and trusting that the as yet unimagined will work it’s way through the fog.

In the short term I am going for a run because that always brings me back with an altered perspective.

I am celebrating (almost) waiting today.