Tag: challenge

Original Thought · Self Improvement

Flip the Page

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A month that was and a month that will be. The flipping of a calendar page should offer pause to reflect on what challenges you faced in September and how you responded to them. Did you shrink away? Are you still researching possible solutions? Was some butt kicked and challenges overcome? Could you have done better? What inspired you in September? Did you try something new? Take on something different? Meet someone special? Were you inspired by a challenge?

I take these somewhat arbitrary but appropriate passages as an opportunity to move ahead. I reflect on what I did and what I could have done another way. I learn from my past experiences, I try not to beat myself up, and I move ahead.

October brings a new season, some celebrations and family gatherings, new opportunities with work, some planned challenges and a birthday. I set out to add some routine – 31 days in a row of writing, 31 consecutive days of working out, and an alcohol free month. I have mental and physical goals attached to these three commitments and a plan and schedule to remove barriers. I have set some expectations of myself and outcomes.

I am also leaving space for the unexpected, the anti-routine. I have a couple of events I am attending that aren’t my usual fare. Places and people that I wouldn’t encounter if I stayed the course. I have 3 books at the ready from authors I don’t know and whose subject matter is outside my comfortable niche. I have set a goal to meet someone new every day; not for any advantage or leverage but just to add their their space with mine for a moment in time. I don’t have any assumptions or predictions about what comes from venturing away from the safety of my shore but I approach October with hope.

What challenged you in September? What inspired? Have you charted a course for parts of October? Are there adventures you are planning?

Make October Remarkable,

B

Self Improvement

The Choice

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Fear is a choice – I can be afraid and paralyzed or I can be afraid and act. The test isn’t being fearless it is being courageous. I heard Jamie Clarke @JC_Climbs and Suzanne West @IamSuzanneWest speak today about failure and the mountain climbing adventurer confessed that he wavers from cowardice to courage in situations that have too many variables. Some days he courts failure as a lover so he can learn from her and other days he hides from her because she can be cruel and unrelenting in seeking accountability. When he faces her she teaches him important lessons.

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Suzanne, who is one of the most self aware people I know, is courageous in her actions, big and brash in her approach and relentless in learning from her failures. They are both inspired by people who are courageous against all odds – Nelson Mandella, Martin Luther King, Laurie Kresslet… Fear is a choice – easy to say, harder to do. Making a choice to move when the mistress is coaxing you to hide, urging you to retreat, inviting you to make excuses is really hard. But when you opt to act, her power wains and yours increases. Even if you fail after facing a fear, you are better off than failing to act and living with the fear and the unknown.

I choose to let fear compromise me sometimes. On the days that I only give 75% (really anything less than 100%), I am preparing a justification for not reaching the goal. “Well I didn’t really work that hard.” as if to justify the limited progress. Fear and failure are about limits. Fear sets a limit, usually way inside our maximum performance or ability and then convinces us not to near that line in the sand. Failure is an accumulation of errors until you reach a limit. If you have an exam in front of you and you haven’t done the preparation. Fear might say ” If you get 60%, that is okay” Failure occurs when you answer too many questions incorrectly and the accumulation drops the percentage below a prescribed pass/fail level.

What if we approached tests, prepared and ready, but also prepared and ready to accept nothing less than our best effort and prepared and ready to learn how you can approach the next exam? Would we move closer to our best? Are you demanding the best from yourself? Is anyone seeing your best work? If the answer is “no” then you might have something to really fear. And another choice to make.

I know I write a lot about risk, courage and taking action. Know that these posts are as much for me as for you.

Make Today Remarkable, by acknowledging fear and acting anyway,
B

Original Thought · Self Improvement

Are You Listening?

Bob McInnisLeave a comment

I need an audience. Without readers, my words fall on deaf ears- no matter how clever, important or irrelevant they seem to be. But do I need to earn the right to speak my truth into the world? Do I need a plan to cultivate listeners? Should I be writing less but better? More and more spontaneous?
When I began I was just writing for me. It was my process and it cleared my head and brought clarity to what I was thinking. Somewhere around post 125 I began to think about you, the reader, and what you were thinking. By number 500, I was focusing on appealing to a specific model reader (who I imagined was out there waiting for my next post). After 600 on makeityourproblem.com and a nearly daily shipping of content to other blogs and forums I realized that my ideas were being censored by an imaginary prospective subscriber. I was tempering my language and censoring ideas that were either too main street or too out of the park. Do all creatives begin to create what they imagine the world, their world, wants?

My mantra that remarkable people use their strengths to strengthen others when they embrace their personal responsibility rather and allow society to absolve them is the genesis of my musings and prose. I seem to have forgotten the motivation and mission. I want to significantly influence thousands of people in their journeys to living a ‘big life’. Are you influenced by these posts? Do you feel that you are living a bigger life, leaning towards being remarkable? Do you remember any of the past 600 posts or the calls to action in about half of them? Would you recall and act if the message was more compelling? Would a change of medium (video, podcast, animation) make a difference? What if the message was being created and delivered by someone else? would a different style be compelling? If this was always satirical would it be impactful?

This year there have been about 25,000 viewers to makeityourproblem.com. I don’t know if that can be considered significant. I sure don’t know if any or all found a gem or a germ they could take away. Maybe the numbers are to small and in order to influence thousands, I need to reach hundreds of thousands. Would you react differently if you knew that 100,000 other folks were ingesting and digesting the same content?

I am taking a chance on a Saturday to write about my secret hopes for this space and for the decisions that I make in my community. Honestly I am apprehensive being so vulnerable and insecure and afraid of rejection. There is a small part of me that hopes no one is listening and another part that is excited that there may be some of you who will reach out a provide honest feedback so I can improve.

Maybe the seasons are changing and as with all things this one has passed.

Cheers and Three Cheers,

B

Self Improvement

Zone of Genius

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Are you operating in your zone of genius? Did you know that you had one? Rhett Power published article in June on Inc. “10 Ways to Acesss Your Creative Genius”

He suggests that “We were each born with an active imagination and creativity. We’ve never really lost it. We just don’t take time to nurture it.” and outlines the 10 steps. (followed by my comments)

  1. Practice doing nothing.  We are flying from one activity to another and get into routines that are the death knell of creativity and effectiveness. When we scramble to put out one fire because another is burning, we get trapped in a narrow set of solutions that appear to be working.
  2. Take time to smell the roses, literally. For those who have read this blog before you know that I suggest that we need to be outside in the world taking in the view at least 1 hour every day. Make it a priority, put it in your calendar and treat it like any other appointment.
  3. Laugh and Play. I am fortunate to have 11 grandkids within 1/2 hour so I am filled with their energy and play. But I also intentionally seek out fun things to do alone and with my beloved.
  4. Challenge your senses. Not only smell the roses but also listen to them. And then describe the senses with a song or a poem.
  5. Write This is quite simply the best outlet and impetus for creative genius I know. I write 1000-2000 words every day. Sometimes it is crap and sometimes it is genius but without doing the writing none of it would show up. As I write solutions to subconscious problems find their way into the stream and new approaches are discovered.
  6. Awaken your animal instinct. I haven’t tried this one but it will become part of my morning run. If you see me leaping and jumping I am striving to be a gazelle. If I am lumbering along, I may be tired or just practicing to be a hippo.
  7. Get out of the box. This is always my favorite but I love ambiguity and change. For less zealous readers you might want to commit to doing one thing for the first time every couple of days.
  8. Imagine yourself in your own perfect world. The preferred future is where abundance and hope resides Hope Opens a Window and Another Hope Lesson from November Hope Series say more about this.
  9. Never listen to negative voices. Easy to say harder to do.  I can take everything personally and need more practice with this.
  10. Applaud yourself for the effort. If you have read this to the end you can clap and celebrate. As you take up 6,7,8,9 of these suggestions give yourself a big Bravo!

Make Today Remarkable, by taking an intentional creative breath,

 

B

Self Improvement

5 Ways to Intentionally Scare Yourself

Bob McInnis1 Comment

Do something that scares you a little. Step into your reality and out of the humdrum by trying something for the first time. Push outside your comfort zone as far as you can and then in a week try something that is even farther away from the complacency and convenience of day-to-day. I am not suggesting that you do anything that is truly reckless, dangerous, illegal or immoral but try something that doesn’t leave your face pressed tightly against the current cozy box. Inside the box you feel safe, sufficient, and sane but life is meant to have tensions, tests, trials and treasures that don’t fit well inside a tight frame.

scare

Here are 5 things to try that shouldn’t shock you but might bring some trepidation.

1. Talk to a stranger – engage with someone on the bus, in a line, at an event, in a park. Someone that you don’t know, someone that you might not meet except in this moment, someone that you aren’t trying to impress. Start the conversation with an easy introduction – hand extended say ” Hi, My name is …” They will reflectively respond with their name. Ask ” What brings you to the … park, store, event?’ or any easy open ended geo-based query. Listen to their response and then ask a third question that their response piqued. The door is open and your challenge is complete – watch where the conversation goes and stay curious.

2. Eat something new – try something ‘unusual’ for the first time or something that you have a bias against because you didn’t like it as a child. You aren’t a child anymore and tastes change. I love Brussel Sprouts, especially in February, but detested them as boiled poop when I was in middle school. Your something new could be fruit, veggie, meat, exotic or simple. It could be prepared at home or purchased from a grocer, cafe, food truck or shared off a friend’s plate. If you expand your palette, you open a window to expand your mind.

3. Take a venturous journey – the world is your oyster so get out there and see her. This could be as simple as riding a bike, public transit, Uber, or walking. It could include flying to Ulan Bator or visiting a farmer’s market that you have ‘wanted’ to get to. You could travel with a group or take a solo sojourn to a mountain, a beach, a lake, a museum. If self propelling your journey (bike/food/blades/paddle) be sure to pause in places that seem interesting or places that seem unusually dull and take in the sights, sounds, smells.

4. Make something – choose to be creative and you are. Bake a cake from a new recipe. Write a poem or paint a picture. Memorize and recite a passage from a play or a quote from a good book. Build a sandcastle, stack rocks, plant a flower, learn to knit, play the ukelele and then as Seth Godin would say ” ship it to the world’ by showing it to someone else. Don’t let the conformity of reality TV like “The Voice” “Idol” assuage you. The road to creativity isn’t necessarily through mimicry, although it is an easier place to start. The real road begins in finding something that makes you smile when you hear it, see it or think about it. Don’t wait for a muse – just color a picture, draw a stick figure, share a ‘crazy’ idea and make it public.

5. Act as if – Take a moment and discover a frivolous indulgence for yourself. You have likely wanted to do something for a long time but have dismissed it as a ‘waste of time, money effort …’. You might want to learn to dance the tango, rock climb or parachute. You could aspire to speak in public, run for office or get a new job. Sailing, singing, sightseeing, flying, fishing, fasting, meeting someone special or making something important. If you take a moment and discover, without debating yourself, what is of interest in this moment it offers a list to begin drawing from. Don’t start with bucket list level stuff (do write those down) but begin with something, just for you, that is just outside your reach. Stretch to start it and then grasp it with both hands and make it the best, the most fun, and the most important activity that you take in that moment. Let yourself enjoy it without judgement or guilt.

The list of 5 isn’t comprehensive but suggestive. Your 5 will be from the sum of your experiences. The key is to begin now and when you check that box begin again.

Make Today Remarkable, by scaring yourself a little,
B

Self Improvement

Contradictions

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Contradictions can be the spice of life. When I meet someone who believes something that I hold dear and acts in a way that resonates with me, I am surprised when we don’t agree about everything. If I hold one value that you hold, do you expect that we will be in sync on most things? As an environmentalists and feminist I am attracted to folks who display some of the same tendencies but have been shocked to then discover that they are anti-something that I also believe. I have, in the past let these contradictions, as I saw them, allow me to cast judgement. I have been quick to dismiss and quicker to challenge. But I have been slow to listen and even slower to let go of my self ascribed moral superiority.

contradictions
Begin a discussion with a stranger or acquaintance with a political question or comment (this subject has been floating around the past two weeks like the aroma from a fresh skunk carcass and will probably reek for the next six months). I have found general agreement on the candidates and the platforms (mostly negative and distrustful) but if we delve into the nest of specifics, things can get testy. Kicking that fire ant’s nest will result in some surprising bites but if you stay in the moment of the discussion, you can learn and teach a lot. The contradictions are as much perspective as opinion and learning something from where someone else is standing is challenging and expansive.
I so often come back to the idea that I need to be curious to understand not curious to gather information so I can win an argument. If I can wonder about something that I instinctively disagree with and ask questions for clarity and context maybe what was a contradiction can become a variance or a different path to the same destination.

Make Today Remarkable, by embracing a couple of contradictions,

B

Self Improvement

Popeye Arms

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Are you exercising regularly but focusing on the same routine? Like Popeye the Sailor Man you may end up with huge forearms and tiny ineffective muscles everywhere else.

popeye

I worry that many of us are exercising our brains but the routine is so predictable that we are growing giant frontal lobes ( not a physical representation but a metaphor for what I see happening). I spent time with three different groups over the past week and discovered that they were well read and well versed in a narrow band that gave them agreement comfort. If we don’t stretch away from the echoes bouncing around in our heads, we end up with a distorted image, likely uni-dimensional of the world that we live in.

I was with 1300 bright, interested, motivated people last week who were okay being pushed within a very small bandwidth. They felt thinking out of the box required that they keep their bodies inside and maybe let their nose sneak out and smell the air. There was an opportunity to be challenged, checked, changed and choices were waiting to be made but there was a lot of escape hatches offered and most people retreated to the same thoughts they were having when they walked in.

I wonder if Trumpamania and Brexit are manifestations of getting to the edge and ‘remembering that the world is really flat’ and pulling back, out of fear, into something that sounds vaguely familiar (and safe). Most troubling is the polarity that single-minded opinions, confirmation conversations, and willfully blind tribal loyalty encourage. The more you focus on bicep curls, the bigger your biceps get but now those tiny calves don’t give you a leg to stand on.

Enter into open and curious conversations with people, books and ideas that you don’t understand and/or disagree with.

B

 

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Alertness

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An immovable object meets a irresistible force and a big bang occurs. Inertia meets excitement, pessimism runs into optimism and neither remains the same. Change occurs even when , or especially when, we aren’t expecting it. I can be convinced, packed, loaded and heading down a certain path and find that the trail ends abruptly. I can detour around the fifteen foot wall, I can try knock it over, I can try climb over it or I can backtrack and try a different path or backtrack and give up. The only unacceptable option for me is to retreat and give up. As long as I am moving, I am making progress. When I drive, I am opportunistic and often make turns at lights or in congestion so I don’t reduce my momentum. When I am working on a project and hit a snag, I admit to feeling frustration seep in and my ambition seep out. If I am alert, I remind myself that the frustration is an opportunity to learn and that my motivation shouldn’t be hinged to progress but instead to effort. Easy to say, harder to do.
The road forward shouldn’t be a safe straight trajectory. I learn much more when I am disrupted and challenged by unexpected barriers and mysterious options. As a impatient imperfectionist with a serious destination bias, I struggle appreciating the journey. But all that I really have is the next stretch of trail before a turn or dip appears and focusing on a finish line that is out of sight reduces enjoyment, possibilities and growth. A finish line mentality also makes me single-minded and blind to other ways and it seems causes an increase in effort as I miss obvious and hidden signals and shortcuts.
In a race following someone who is slightly faster or more fit can lead to improved times and maybe a personal best but getting caught up in beating other runners creates the wrong focus. I am running on an unknown course this weekend and am reminding myself to be alert for hazards, pay attention to markers, enjoy the snot bubbling elevation changes and enjoy challenging myself in relation to the results I have accomplished in previous runs. It may not be perfect (for sure), it may not be pretty (likely) but it will be positive regardless of how or where I finish ( I recognize that there is a part of me that sees another first place as some other kind of validation and need to keep that ambition tempered.)

If I need a reminder this weekend of the immovable object and irresistible force, there is a great likelihood that we will encounter bears on the route. This past week black bears and grizzlies have been seen enjoying the sunshine in the open meadows and trudging up some of the logging roads. Knowing that there is something dangerous around the next corner or the next will be a strong prompt to stay in the moment and learn something from each step.

My training over the past couple of weeks has focused on proper for and good equipment. Even when I am experimenting with new shoes or an new idea, I need to think about the process and if my posture and carriage is getting the maximum results from all the effort. The difference between success and less than success can come down to a blister or a blistering start. It can be challenged by a desperate need or bias and the idea doesn’t gain roots because it was seeded haphazardly.

Like most of my work and my recreation having a strategic plan can be useless. Knowing my strategic position; some future preferred state and staying pointed in that general direction can allow the race or practice to be interesting, efficient and still leave room for leaps over logs and leaps of logic. In ideation and trail running, iteration is generative. One step builds on the next and attaches itself to the delta of previous changes. One step becomes 1000 becomes 10K and word becomes a phrase becomes a sentence becomes an idea that synthesises to another idea and creates something that has the same grit and dirt of both but smells and feels oddly different than might have been expected.
As I head out early tomorrow morning with some excitement and apprehension I will be reminding myself to be alert for changes, be ready with resources (bear spray and nutrition) and be ready for a lot of unexpected challenges and unexpected opportunities.

Make Today Remarkable by being alert,

B

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Are you Open to Fulfillment?

Bob McInnis4 Comments

Do we even understand what living a fulfilled life might look like? What are the things that you would need to be fulfilled? Love, time, money. security, purpose, a new car, friends, family, relationships, health, clothes, fame …? What would be in your list? Take 5 minutes right now and list all the things (material and immaterial, worldly and spiritual, big and small) that you believe would bring you ‘happiness’. Your list will be different than mine, different from your brother’s, your partner’s or your children’s.

What are the barriers? What do you need less of to gain fulfillment? Are you physically limited in achieving or striving for those things on your list? Have you thought about why those things are/should be important? Are stress, conflict, timidity, uncertainty, lack of confidence, lack of wisdom, limited understanding, damaged relationships, poor health on the list?

Are  you interested and committed to seeing how much of the two lists you can change? Are you ready to shake things up and trust that the Universe has a plan for you and that you need to seek it? Do you want to make meaning for your life?

The next three weeks, I commit to sharing this journey with you, as I undertake it. I will write something here that I observe, learn, discover – good and bad. Are you willing to join me?

 

Make Today the Beginning,

B

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Appreciation

Bob McInnis1 Comment

As you continue to spend time in breathing practice, it is time to begin appreciation practice.  Appreciation has a couple of meanings, both of which are important; a fully and deep understanding of the situation and the recognition and enjoyment of the good qualities of someone or something.

“Our real blessings often appear to us in the shape of pains, losses and disappointments; but let us have patience and we soon shall see them in their proper figures.”

~ Joseph Addison

Again,I remind you that first steps are hard to take even when they may not be difficult to do. Today you take a second step towards hope and possibility.

To begin, I am not asking you to be grateful or express gratitude, not yet. This exercise is about understanding and recognition. It is a head practice not a heart (that will come later). Today we begin training our senses; sight, hearing, taste, touch to fully understand what is in front of us.

  1. grab a pen and paper. you will need this every morning
  2. take 5 minutes to consider one aspect of your life – emotional, relational, financial …
  3. in more than 5 and less than 15 words meaningfully describe reality (as you currently see it) of the situation
  4. find at least one good quality in the situation and write it in ALL CAPS
  5. Repeat the good quality three times and repeat it  again throughout the day
  6. Repeat tomorrow

That’s it a second step taken. Your commitment to changing your life has begun. You have started taking control. Mediocrity and misery won’t like what you are doing so be mindful that they may go on the offensive and try sabotage your steps. When you feel the challenge pressing – breathe and repeat the ALL CAPS good quality three times.

Step 3, tomorrow,

B