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What is Meaning?

“Meaning is not something you stumble across, like the answer to a riddle or the prize in a treasure hunt. Meaning is something you build into your life. You build it out of your own past, out of your affections and loyalties, out of the experience of humankind as it is passed on to you, out of your own talent and understanding, out of the things you believe in, out of the things and people you love, out of the values for which you are willing to sacrifice something. The ingredients are there. You are the only one who can put them together into that unique pattern that will be your life. Let it be a life that has dignity and meaning for you. If it does, then the particular balance of success or failure is of less account.”

— From a speech John W. Gardner delivered to the Hawaii Executive Conference in Kona, Hawaii, in April 1993

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Are You Having Enough Fun? Likely Not.

A life filled with joy is a life worth living. Abundance of fun need not be expensive. Doing something, anything, many things that make you smile every day can even be free.

If you set a personal mission for today to recognize the ‘fun opportunity” at least once an hour, you will have a dozen or more reasons to smile (that you may have missed).

You can be childlike without being childish. A child always wants to have fun. Ask yourself, ‘Am I having fun?’  Christopher Meloni

If you need permission (you don’t) I am giving it to you. Be childlike in your pursuit of fun. and take a moment to relish in it. It seems to be infectious.


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Mystery

I knew I was in trouble when I made a statement, in a meeting, that I had no doubt to be perfectly crafted and assuredly true. There was a flash that lit up in my peripheral vision that had happened, and been ignored, a dozen times in the last week: A warning that I wasn’t heeding like high blood pressure.

I had become an expert again. The “Hi my name is Bob and I am an expert” kind of expert.  I was certain about everything, sure about my direction, completely confidence in my advise, remarkable in my coaching, and unbelievable in my consulting. I was the pearl in my own oyster – perfect.

Of course, none of that was real. Perception had trapped me again. I have been recovering from the curse of expertitis for 25 years but this bout seemed deeper and I was actually enjoying the spotlight even more than usual.

When I spend time with children, my grandkids in particular, I am reminded what the as yet unimagined has to offer. They zealously seek new ways of overcoming challenges. They embraced curiousity through sincere and outrageous questions. There is a zeal for exploration and risk that comes from a different confidence than the expert. They are confident that the world is theirs to explore and by turning everything on its head, they see the world anew.  My confidence was based in formulas, models, tried and true experiences, status quo. In today’s world where everything is changing, exponentially,  we all need to find the child’s position for a few hours a week. This isn’t just a provocation exercise, it serves as an innovation platform. You can launch your next ‘cool’ idea and watch it soar or sink without fear.

Take 4 hours this week (4/168 = 2.38%) to be open to curiousity, search out mystery and take something that you are so confident about and give it a good shake. I, for one, would be curious what flies out.

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How do You add Value?

Are you an adder or a subtracter? Most of us add and subtract value every day. At the end of the day, what is your +/- rating? Are you giving excellence to your work, relationships and self?

Having a net positive day, week, life doesn’t happen by accident. It requires intention and action that is pointed to creating value. It requires persistence in the face of convenience. It requires character.

Just being aware that all our choices and actions have consequences, good or bad,  is a great first step. You can make a difference. Your decisions change you, change your relationships, change your relationships and change your world.

I am intentionally trying to be healthier. When I run, workout, play sports, walk, resist temptations I am taking positive steps toward living healthier. As I work to get healthier, others see my efforts. My relationship with my beloved, my kids, my family, my friends is improved when I feel better. My community doesn’t need to have space, resources or energy to devote to my care and can direct it where it is needed most. When I go to the gym today, eat more fruits and vegetables, moderate my vices I can add these to the positive side of my ledger.

When a client requests my services and I don’t do my best, I subtract. When one of my grandkids needs a receptive ear and I am there – I add. When I don’t react to being delayed in traffic or angrily curse at being cutoff – I add.

Are you up to a challenge? Would you observe as many of your intentions and actions as you can for the next 7 days and record whether they are positive or negative. Will you try to add value and excellence in every situation, for just the next 168 hours? If you are up to it, I would appreciate (and I am sure other readers would too) if you would comment on this post or associated tweet with #value and your total?

Make Today Remarkable. Make adding value your problem.

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Children and Grandchildren

children

We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today. ~Stacia Tauscher

How do we honor our children and grandchildren regardless of their age?

– be a great listener (listen intently and listen globally to what is said and unsaid)

– be equitable ( try to bring what is needed to each child in each situation, not just their share, not  what they deserve but what they need)

– be a confidant ( keep the secrets that are shared unless danger is involved)

– be a reliable parent ( quality time only works if their is enough quantity time for the relationship to blossom)

A child can ask questions that a wise man cannot answer. ~Author Unknown

I am often surrounded by people who think they are experts. I am often one of them, myself.  My expertise blinds me with bias and blinkers me to options. I hope to learn to be more like my grandchildren who ask with curiousity not problem solving at the heart.

Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there. – Will Rogers

My impatient, imperfectionist with an action bias shining through.

Make Today Remarkable, for a child,

Bob