I suspect that my suspicions are unwarranted. Or at least they are unsubstantiated. My ability and tendency to make decisions easily and quickly mean that I also come to judgement quickly and easily. If the ease and speed aren’t tempered with research, reflection and discernment, then my confirmation bias takes over and I begin to categorise ideas and people based on sketchy and incomplete information. Unfortunately, first impressions, valid or not, are lasting. If I conclude that someone has ulterior or selfish motives, it will take a long time and consistent effort to move me from that position and I will likely hear everything they say through a muddy translation.
Changing how I react to perceived circumstances is entrenched from years of using this heuristic. My rush to decide won’t be easy to change but I can be aware of by predisposition and be aware that it may not be accurate. Awareness of my tendency opens the possibility that I can deliberately short circuit the shortcut.
Have you ever made a choice, a decision, a judgement and in the light of time, information, and/or confirmation changed your mind? I have been enamoured with an idea that I later realized was clunky logic. I have been awed by a person and her rhetoric only to discover that there wasn’t anything substantial there. I have opted to dislike a friend of a friend because of how I interpreted something that they said only to discover that my translation of the event was significantly different than theirs and they became a respected colleague. I have rejected people and ideas because of their proximity to ideas and people that I disagreed with so I discredited the new ideas and people by association.
I have also felt the sting of guilt by association, the pain of rejection because of a misunderstanding and I know I have disappointed people because their initial view of me and my capabilities exceeded my willingness and skills.
Knowing that and having felt that I should be able to draw on the sum of my experience rather than a narrow bandwidth of it. If I can pause and draw on the wider view, my snap decisions should be better,
Make Today Remarkable, by doubting your initial observation,
What makes passionate people uncontrollably optimistic? I met with a friend a colleague for breakfast and she reminded me enthusiastically that her attitude and disposition are contagious. She is unreserved in her excitement for what she is doing and achieving. Her perception in the face of challenges is opportunities. When she sees a gap she takes the initiative to fill it and where her preferred future is threatened she seeks to understand and overcome the barriers.
This isn’t a rose coloured naivety or gushing utopian rhetoric but rather a way to frame her days/weeks/months; her life. Realty wraps itself around us but we have the pleasure and responsibility of seeing it as a prospective possibility rather than a debilitating defeat.
Life is a series of experiences and perception is the economy with memories acting as the currency. We can be rich or we can be poor. It seems that we are able to manufacture and re-craft our experiences by changing our point of view and altering our response to the circumstances we face. When we capture memories, we add to our riches because they can be revisited, revised and re-remembered and relived and relished. If we pass through the events and moments of our day with disinterest and ennui we are less likely to perceive anything worth stashing in our wallet.
In order to change our tomorrows we need to be alive in our todays. Sleepwalking through a Thursday wastes a gift but also contributes to creeping lethargy on Friday, Saturday and Monday. I encourage you to go through today with your eyes open for glee, greatness, and grand adventures. If they don’t appear, shift your intention to opportunity and watch for a small shift towards hope. It is within your sight but may be shrouded by a bias, your mood, or an unwillingness to get out of the ditch.
If you want to stay in the rut that is wrestling with you then stop reading and hunker down for a full nelson suffocation. If you are already seeing beauty and awe, congratulations and keep pressing forward. If you are down but don’t want to be out, take small chance and smile, smell roses, see something special, and say something sunny to yourself and someone else.
Begin every day with a sincere and grateful heart and eyes wide open for the best in people, events and yourself.
Make Today Remarkable, by seeing it as remarkable,